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June 15, 2005 |
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| Father’s Day - what’s always important | |
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By Colleen Gengler,
U of M Extension Service
June with its Father’s Day celebration is a great time to acknowledge how important dads are in children’s lives. Children with involved, loving fathers are significantly more likely to do well in school, have healthy self-esteem, show empathy and good social behavior. They’re also more likely to avoid high risk behaviors such as drug abuse or truancy, compared to children who don’t have involved fathers. Year around, here are some things for all families and communities to consider. At home, it’s important for fathers to share responsibilities for children’s care. Dads and moms may do certain chores or tasks differently, and that’s okay. Time just with dad makes for good parent-child connections. In the workplace, employers and co-workers should recognize that men have some family responsibilities and commitments. Respect, not condescension, is in order for men who choose to put their families first. At school, men can be invited to be book readers, room coordinators or be involved in the learning process just as moms. Both moms and dads have special skills that can contribute to children’s learning. Schools need to make special efforts to involve both parents if parents live apart in invitations to events, information about school policies and programs, and general family-school concerns. In legal situations, dads’ rights to see their children should be honored. Keeping a parent and child apart is painful to both. Only cases of mental, physical or sexual abuse warrant separating a child from the parent. At the doctor’s office, dad’s opinions count. Health care professionals increasingly are recognizing that dads today play an active role in the health and physical care of their children. In parent and family events, organizers need to make sure activities are planned with both moms and dads in mind. In parent education, researchers have found that men have special needs: more guidance about connecting with their children and, in a few cases, assistance with anger management. It’s healthy when opportunities can be created that put dads together to talk over issues that concern them. Dad’s role in the family has many similar functions to what moms do. But, it’s not always the same. Dads can offer their unique perspective. The ideal situation for children is to have the involvement of both parents in their lives. In a review of nearly 100 studies of parent-child relationships, father love was as important as mother love in predicting the social, emotional and mental development and functioning of children and young adults. Father’s Day offers us a special time to recognize the importance of dads, but let’s keep it in the forefront all year around. (Colleen Gengler is a family relations specialist with the University of Minnesota Extension Service Regional Center, Worthington) |
©Murray County News 2010